Teachings of Gurdjieff: A Pupil's Journal
C.S. Nott lived at the Prieure, worked in Orage's New York group, and continued in the work during succeeding decades. Orage's insightful "Commentary on Beelzebub" comprises Chapter III. In the late 1920's, C.S. Nott asked Gurdjieff to give him a hint of what his "idiot" represented, as a "key to my state and behaviour." "At first he would not. But I pressed him and almost begged him to give me at least a hint. Soon he began to speak, and then in a sentence of five words told me. I was astonished at the clarity and simplicity of his words...I saw my chief feature, something I never even suspected...I saw how this something had been my worst enemy even from a child...I realized also that if it had not been for Gurdjieff and his method I might have always remained the same, repeating and behaving in the same way...It is astonishing and terrifying that one can go on for years living a false picture of oneself."
C.S. NOTT Teachings of Gurdjieff
New York: Penguin Arkana, 1990
Paperback, 230 pages